In which Blue feels ...

... happy for someone else and sorry for herself. Can you be happy and sad at the same time?

I'm ecstatic to announce that Evil Genius Husband's younger older sister (did that make sense?), Dr SIL, had her baby yesterday! Baby "I" was born about noon after a short-ish induced labour. I'll have more details this afternoon.

I'm inundated with conflicting emotions. I'm so delighted that baby "I" (we need to come up with another blog name for him soon!) is here safe and sound and I can't wait to see him. I'm happy that there's another cousin to add to TypeA SIL's adorable daughter (who needs a blog name as well. Hmmm).

....

....

But I'm terribly unhappy that I'm not pregnant right now. If it weren't for the Insurance Company That Sucks, the worker's comp case, and the Operation That Did No Bloody Good, I'd be right on track. Due about May.

I just want to break something every time I think about it.

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So today will be filled with ironies! I've (ironically!) got an appointment with my obgyn to get some blood pulled for some basic tests (FSH, estrogen, etc). Perhaps we can find out why I'm not preggers yet. The current theory is: I'm old and my body just doesn't feel like playing any more. I also have a mammogram - my first - that I'm not looking forward to for a few reasons, not least of which that breast cancer is a close personal friend of my family.

On the way I'm picking up some flowers for Dr SIL, adoring Baby "I", and gazing wistfully at all the newborns through the nursery glass.

I think I'll see if I can get her some roses. I finally had to acknowledge that the dozen white roses that EGH had gotten me for our anniversary had given up the ghost and throw them away. I love white roses. I wonder if Dr SIL would like some as well?

Perhaps it will make us both feel better.