Friday, March 03, 2006

So, what makes a mom?

How nifty is this?!

Here's a cool article on the subject that's a bit more science-geeky and even Snopes verified that the story is true.

While Googling along merrily I came across this older - and more thought provoking - story about an IVF transfer mix up. Remember that?

At the bottom of the article (man, doesn't the media just love to pounce on any legal action?) they talk about two other mix-up cases and who got to keep the resulting babies. I'm really torn on this one. I mean, I'm a person who believes that a bio parent who gave her child up for adoption should NOT be able to just claim that child back. Remember adopted baby Jessica? Remember the news clip of them taking that baby, screaming, out of her home? (side note: Oh, they would have had to have killed me. They would have had to have stepped over my dead body to get that baby from me. I'm just sayin')

Anyway, what are your feelings on this? If you did a successful IVF and discovered that the child wasn't yours would you give him up? What if you found out that he was 'half yours' (your egg and strangers sperm/ strangers egg and your husband's sperm)? Would the child being of a different race from you impact your decision?

As a person who suffered through infertility for a long time I can really empathize with both sides of the coin (although I never had the money to even consider ART, I did look into fostering and domestic adoption). But now, having 4 beautiful bio babies, it's easy for me to throw around opinions, ya know?. My inclination now is to say that if another couple accidentally got my embie and had the baby, that I'd gladly not contest their right to keep her.

But would I say that if I was on the hellish end of a string of failed IVF cycles?

Yep. This is a tough one.


Note: This post is not intended to be provocative. I am a just huge fan of biology in general and genetics in particular, so this fascinates me. I'd love to go into some field having to do with genetics, but can't think of what. Hey, I'm just amazed that, at the age of 42, I've finally decided what I want to be when I grow up!

Second note: So I guess what I'm saying is that, being pro ART and Pro adoption, I feel like the whole bio thing is not particularly relevant. A mother is a woman who does what I do every day: kisses owies, dries tears, fixes meals, changes nappies, buckles carseats, says: "no, you can't do that right now" and "Hitting is ugly" and "I know you want that toy, but you must share". A mother invests her best time and most energy to helping a little person to be a competent, useful, and happy big person one day. The similarity in their two genomes is beside the point in my definition.

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posted by MrsEvilGenius @ 2:02 pm   1 comments


At 12:27 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What makes a mom you ask? well here, let me tell you. A mother is someone like myself who can flip a leg kickin, screaming, crying baby down inside the back seat of their car, and go through the motions of a full outright cloth diaper change complete with safety pins and rubber pants, all while holding a freshly lit cigarette between her tightly pursed lips, and all while not missing so much as a single beat! Or administering a good old-fashioned spanking on an unruly child while at the same time, steering and navigating a mini van down tight streets and straightaways just to prove that "mommy" can do anything. Ya right I say!


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