Thursday, November 27, 2008

"How to NOT gain weight this holiday season! Guaranteed!"


So my inbox and teh interwebz seem to be full, the past few days, of articles on "how to avoid gaining weight over the holiday", "how to not blow your diet during Thanksgiving and Christmas", "how to keep added holiday pounds to a minimum", and, finally, "how to prepare to lose that holiday weight!"

Say what?

I have a suggestion ... why don't you exercise some self control and NOT eat like a pig at the trough over the holidays?

Ohhh, Blue, you say; harsh!

Nope.  Practical.

There's no reason whatsoever why a normal person can't get through the holidays without gaining weight. Why do you eat so much?  Is there any sane reason why normally sensible people will eat six times the amount of food required for an adult at Thanksgiving (and Christmas, and the days after each)?

"But I LOVE strained beet casserole", you wail, "and mom always puts raisins and marshmallows on top! And I can only get it during the holidays so I eat as much as possible!"

Why?  If you love it so much, why don't you make it all year?

"It's special!  It's the holidays! I deserve to eat nice things in huge quantities!  It makes me happy!"

So, we have become so overindulged that we think we are entitled to gorge ourselves pleasurably (for the 6 minutes it takes to eat those 4 servings of Mom's Marshmallowy Beet Casserole)  because it's a certain day of the year?

That makes no sense to me.  But, ya know what?  It doesn't have to.

People really are entitled to come together two days of the year (whether they want to or not) and turn perfectly healthy foods like green beans, sweet potatoes, and turkey into calorie and fat laden crap.  They are allowed to eat more food than an Ethiopian child sees in a year (and toss twice that into the trash afterwards).  It's a free country.

But you shouldn't get to whine afterwards!

You have control over your own self.  Why not eat normal portions of everything you really love?  Why not gather up the cousins and take a long walk through the neighbourhood before supper?  Turn off the stupid televisions, break out the red wine, and put on some dance music.

If you're cooking, why not baste with broth that's been skimmed of fat rather than melted butter?  Why not skim milk, artificial sweetener, and lo-fat cheese?  Try different recipes for calorie bombs like sweet potato casserole.  Bake that turkey and save wodges of money on that horrible peanut oil that you'll just dump out afterward.

And while we're at it, how about freezing the turkey bones to boil for stock?  Make up a plate or 2 or 4 for elderly neighbours. Veggies cooked plain like corn, beans, peas, and carrots can be tossed in the freezer for soups rather than dumped into the disposal.  Unopened and uneaten bread or rolls or canned goods?  Donate tomorrow to your local battered women's shelter.  Those girls are just thankful they have a safe place to be.

The holidays don't have to be an orgy of overindulgence followed by agonising over how much money was spent and weight gained.  They can be fun and thrifty and healthy. 

Try it.

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posted by MrsEvilGenius @ 5:48 am   1 comments


At 10:56 am, Anonymous Funnygirl said...

I make a big holiday dinner, and it makes me shudder when you talk about throwing things down the disposal. I'm a big believer in using leftovers to make other dishes, and I've never thrown a turkey carcass away in my life. Do people actually do that? I make enough soup to feed us for days.

Good ideas for people who aren't in that mode already, Blue. I'm still freaking out about the whole throwing away food thing, though. My grandmother would turn over in her grave.


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