Bad dreams, better days?

Well, now time passed and now it seems
Everybody's having them dreams.
Everybody sees themselves walkin' around with no one else. *

I had a strange dream last night.

Well, a really strange dream as all of my dreams are freakin' bizarre. Anyway, I went into the hospital all alone in the middle of the night for my c-section.

In my dream, I was standing in the eerie darkness of a well-scrubbed hallway listening to the quiet hum of machines and wondering where the heck everybody was. No hospital is ever empty. I mean, even if you can't see the patients, there are people: family members who are staying round the clock with loved ones, staff moving quietly between nurses stations, somebody.

It was very dark and spooky and I was in a waiting room type place with a glass elevator. Behind another frosted glass wall was an OR. Along the dark hallway was more frosted glass and I finally saw some movement - someone passed by, sillouhetted behind the glass. Figuring it was the nurses station, I hurried down the corridor until I found a doorway. I was startled to find that it opened out into an enormous warren-like room of open plan cubicles (like in an office). I finally found a nurse.

She seemed to be leaving for the day, packing up her stuff distractedly. I told her that I was here for my c-section and she said that she'd "try to find someone to do it" and disappeared in the maze of cubicles. I remember not being particualrly upset by this except for thinking: "Oh please don't let it be Dr Arrogant Bully"

Finally a very young female doctor appeared and told me that she'd do my c-section just as soon as she found an assistant. Moments later a very young male orderly showed up in disheveled green scrubs and we went into the OR.

Soon I'm sitting up on the table, fully clothed, and holding a tiny kitten (there's an obvious baby reference there) and the orderly is trying to get an IV in it's little forearm. I'm nervously asking him if he's ever inserted an IV on a kitten and the doc is bustling around finding surgical instruments in the drawers.

The dream became confused after that as I started getting more and more agitated. The young doctor was trying to make me lie down and the kitten was crying. I don't remember the rest.

I guess it's normal to have scary dreams as one gets close to delivery. I clearly have a fear that something will happen to (or be wrong with) my baby. I'm amazed at how I was much more concerned that the doctor was female than with the fact that she was going to perform major abdominal surgery on me with just an orderly's help. Obviously I'm not worried about myself too much.

Well, on that note, I'm off to my 36 week appointment (with Dr Young Dark and Handsome assuming he's not called away). I've shaved the ole cootchie and everything, just in case. Less than 3 weeks to go ...

Due to a busy week and bad week-end I've not gotten a chance to read all of my fave blogs. I'll try to catch up tomorrow. I read a few yesterday and it seems I'm not the only one who's been having a crap time. Grrl's beloved cat is ill (plus she has rats as well!) , Bugs's gran is not expected to make it, and one of my very fave bloggers, Soper, is taking a bit of time off due to family issues. Since she's closed her comments all I can do is say it here: Soper, I will really miss your words until you feel like coming back.

In better news, Karry (who apparently has some primo Whisky Tango neighbours of her own) seems to have gotten the Bus Stop Fiasco sorted, and Pazel has brought little Jack HOME!

There is some good in the world. OK ... off to my appointment.


*copyright 1963 Bob Dylan - Talkin' World War III Blues