Wednesday, February 01, 2006

A whole month into the new year?

W-what the heck happened to the end of 2005? How can we be into February? How can my baby be less than 3 weeks away from being FOUR? Agh! Aggghhh!

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On a more coherent note: in an effort to make Dad more comfortable I broke out the kerosene (paraffin) heater. I, who have enough padding for three - maybe four - people, have been one long hot flash since.

Dad, who now has no body fat (as in zero, zilcho body fat. None. He is composed now of bones, veins, and skin), clung to it like velcro. He hangs over it like one of those stereotypical old farts you see in bad Old West films; gathered 'round the wood stove in the general store telling tall tales and working thermo problems in their heads.

He will actually go sit next to it, in the mud room with the dogs, supposedly doing exercises, but hunched over his cell phone (probably morosely telling his friends about how I'm trying to freeze him to death.)

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In my ongoing attempt to inherit Dad's vast array of Craftsman tools, I did the domestic equivalent of rolling him into traffic (remember that?): I left him at home. Alone. With his grandchildren.

NineWunWun! NineWunWun!

No, seriously, this is a busy week for me. I had an appointment yesterday at 2:00 (Note: children nap from 11 to 3) so I availed myself of Dad's presence and took the Incredible Bulk and left Dad with the three Big Bad Babies.

I had to take Bulk because there was no way Dad could care for an almost-eight-month-old who's just learned to sit unassisted and can't-quite-almost-but-not hold his bottle by himself.

Dad, of course, did great. He claims that the babies were fab but I greet this with a smidgen of suspicion. My Mum also claims that the babies are good when she keeps them but my house looks like a hurricane roared through when I get home (unless, of course, she's cleaned something; in which case I feel like I'm in the wrong house.)

But everything was intact, Dad seemed unstressed, the babies were fine.

Bulk and I had a good outing. It was the very first time he'd been out without his sibs and you'd've thought he was an alien baby here on assignment to study humans. Evil Genius Husband and I have long thought that this might be the case.

Bulk has that laser stare:



And he employed it freely on everyone, piercing them with the intense gaze of a creature who has never seen humans before and wonders if their brains might be good to eat.

He also rode in the shopping trolley for the first time (sitting in the seat rather than reclining in his carseat). He promptly displayed his prowess at both sitting and grabbing by hefting my Supersized drink (which I'd sat beside him - stupidly) and hurling it over the side, retaining the straw to gnaw on.

He spent the rest of the trip goggling about, talking very loudly ("GLUR! Ababababa! BAH!"), and finally fell asleep in the checkout line on something that had to be scanned.

Not too bad a day, really. Hopefully today: the dreaded Traffic Court and Hella Expensive Ticket day will go as well. Or at least a little bit. *sigh*

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EDITED to correct some glaring grammaticular errorage that I spotted immediately but freakin' Blogger wouldn't let me in to fix!

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posted by MrsEvilGenius @ 6:47 pm   0 comments

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